The God Suppository: Side Effects May Vary.

Let me begin by saying, that I again do not propose to have all of the answers to the inner workings of the universe and would not expect of any of you to argue that I am some sort of genius on my behalf, although the thought is well received. I am going to maintain my staunch stance on religion and the notion that it poisons the well of society to a point that exposes even the most reasonable individual as a ‘god fearing’ cretan that acts purely out of self preservation. 


I want to start my article, which will continue into future segments on religion and the supernatural should cooler minds prevail when the dust settles. So let’s dive into it shall we; Do we need God to exist to make our existence significant? I think most of the individuals that attend church on a daily basis would agree with that notion whether it’s internally or vocalized. Why do I say this? Mainly because many of the weekly churchgoers* these days and years before like to think themselves as the highest form of intelligence bar none and thus are worthy of the term ‘god’s greatest creation.’ Now these are the same individuals who will argue that the birth of a child is a ‘miracle of life’ thus drawing a line that separates the sacred from the rest of the world’s inhabitants. How is childbirth a miracle? If we were the only sentient being that could reproduce at will then perhaps I might argue on the side of the ‘pro lifers’ that have to turn every cause into a bumper sticker. However, we know that this is not the case, in fact animals were producing millions of years before humans even existed and managed to survive without the means of any sort of ‘lifelines’ that support our own existence. I would say that the fact that evolution is a reality that any idiot with half a brain that paid attention to 6th grade biology could figure out, I would say that the ability of dinosaurs and ocean dwelling creatures to adapt and survive for millions of years qualifies as more of a ‘miracle’ than say,  a species who consciously reproduces in the hopes of having their own ‘mini-them’. Plus if life is so sacred than why do we relegate the word ‘sacred’ to only human life? The same people that will argue for the sanctity of a human embryo are the same individuals that ingest young calves by the quarter pound patty and subsequently argue over the evils of experimenting on unborn fetuses. “Two different things!”you say as you spit out chunks of processed meat across the table? Are they really? I call bullshit on that two faced view of ‘sacred life’. 


Do you know why humans take precedence over other creatures? It’s for the simple fact that humans are the only creatures that can talk and present a personality through language. Human beings view animals as menial creatures that eat and overproduce and thus need to be tapered back, this is a common argument used to describe the need to hunt deer. Hmm an overpopulated, over eating species that serve no purpose other than it’s own self preservation? That sounds an awful lot like umm… humans? Do animals have the potential to destroy ecosystems and become over populated? Yes of course they do, were you not paying attention in 6th grade biology again?! But let me say this: no other animal outside the human race has ever consciously made another creatures life miserable in the hopes of some sort of personal gain. We are an inherently destructive race that knowingly feels the need to piss our name in every inch of grass we see and plaster concrete over any low lying swamp land that could be better utilized as a ‘housing complex’ for minorities. And all in the name of religion and ‘progress’. I’d like to pinpoint the exact moment when progress stopped being about helping others and more about a nice car and a paycheck. I guess those guys in the flat earth society who wrote the bible forgot to do a little bit surveying before they decided to build a religion out of the human misery around them. 


So in closing, Do we need God to exist for us to feel important? For the puritan that needs that reassurance whenever they look in the mirror before they go out into the world, I’d say the answer is indisputably yes. But for those of you who have no need of fairy tale mythology to explain why your neighbor is fucking your wife beyond the fact that she’s a whore, than good on you for not following the rest of your species of the cliffs of delusion. 


*Let me clarify that by churchgoer I mean those that make the conscious effort to go to church every week. Not like those once a year fucks that hog the pews on Christmas Eve. 


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